Three easy ways to practice gratitude as a family

Gratitude is a powerful force. It can turn one’s whole day around. Simply thinking about the things we are grateful for squeezes out negative thoughts that creep in. But it’s a skill that has to be practiced.

When the kids were younger (preschool age) we talked about the concept of gratitude simply by asking them:

Here are a few simple ways we exercise our thankful muscles:

1. KEEP A GRATITUDE JOURNAL

Our favorite way to practice with the kids is through gratitude journals. We have a beautifully kept record of drawings, writings and what life was like at the time. A blank notebook, journal, or several pieces of blank paper stapled together is perfect.

We have three simple prompts:

• Write the date
• Draw a picture of yourself and how you’re feeling
• Draw a picture of and/or write about three things you’re grateful for

The lists of things have ranged from water, trees, favorite foods and family members to themselves and planet Earth.

Why it works:

• Creative self-expression and quiet self-reflection always seems to change our children’s dispositions for the better.
• They love showing off their creations.
• We don’t force the activity or use it as a catalyst for a bad day.
• Some days, the kids choose this activity on their own.

2. TALK ABOUT THINGS WE’RE GRATEFUL FOR

The parents chime in for this activity. It happens as I remember (which isn’t every night.)

This is how it typically goes:

• Before we eat our meal, we say a simple prayer/phrase like, “Thank you for this food.”
• I look to the kids and say, “Tell us X number of things you’re grateful for.”
• The kids take turns, without hesitation. We just let them talk. If they go under or over the number, it’s okay.
• Grown ups go next. We talk about our list – sometimes acknowledging it’s the same as the kids.
• We eat dinner.

Why it works:

• We give our undivided attention and try not to interrupt. Everyone feels heard.
• Talking about our feelings is important to our family and we try to foster a welcoming space for it.
• It’s important to check in with each other. It helps the grownups understand how our kids are feeling.
• Sometimes, if the kids are having a rough day, this activity helps them change their focus.

3. THANKFUL TREE

This is an activity we bring out around the holidays (Thanksgiving, etc.) I found a simple 12 inch tall wooden tree that we’ve used but any “tree,” two or three dimensional will work for this purpose. I also found small gift tags to use. If a tree is not your thing, Amazon has a huge selection of Thanksgiving and gratitude-themed crafts to inspire the season Thanksgiving Gratitude Crafts.

This is how it goes:

• We set up the tree when I set out decorations for Thanksgiving.
• Then each member of our family writes something that we’re grateful for on one of the gift tags and hang it up on the tree.
• I keep a pen and the stack of gift tags next to the tree.
• Our family writes our “thankful things” down whenever we think something.
• Then we reflect on our additions throughout the season.

Why it works:

• There’s no pressure to do this activity, but the kids see it and write things down periodically.
• We can all see what we are all grateful for. Sometimes, it’s each other. (Which is nice!)
• It’s a symbol for the season and a nice decoration.
• We save our gift tags and reflect on them every year.

In years past, the thankful tree was a large piece of paper that I taped up on our wall. I drew a simple outline of a tree and made cutouts of our family’s hands on construction paper. Then we helped the kids write about “the things that made them happy” on the hands and taped them up on the “tree.”

How do you practice gratitude with your family? Let me know in the comments.